The Predicament of “Feeling Worthless"
Have you ever felt worthless? The kind that seeps deep into your bones. The kind that feels like a knife to your ribs, and you can’t seem to find a way out of it?
It feels like everything is going alright and than out of the blue, you are hit with a wave of sadness and worthlessness.
I feel like self-esteem has a lot to do with it. I’ve seen people pretending to be someone they’re absolutely not.
No seriously, they try to act a certain way, behave in a way they absolutely don’t behave in real life, and that is just distressing to see.
And it all boils down to self-worth. Do you see yourself as someone worthwhile?
Or do you think that if you disappear for a few days, no one would notice? I ask all these questions, because that’s what life is about!
Mindfulness and it comes with asking the hard questions that you won’t ask yourself. So I’ll do it for you.
First of all, I’ll give you a small, really small toolkit to analyse yourself right now.
- You compare yourself to others.
- You feel sad and unhappy that people think bad about you.
- You feel as if “nobody cares.” (that’s not true ofcourse!)
- You feel as if your friends are all pretending to like you and gossip about you behind your back.
- You essentially feel like everyone on planet earth is “better” than you.
So? Where do you lie? Do you have some of the symptoms mentioned above but not all? Don’t worry, hope is definitely not lost.
The above statements might seem ludicrous to someone not going through this. But to me, personally, I’ve felt it all. I’ve seen people go down dark roads because of their perceived “low self-esteem.”
This is because low self esteem is the primary cause of feeling unworthy.
You feel as if everyone is better than you, smarter than you and you just beat yourself up.
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
— Eleanor Roosevelt.
Reasons of “Feeling Worthless"
Too many people overvalue what they are not and undervalue what they are.”
— Malcolm S. Forbes.
- The first and foremost reason of any mental disorder it seems is childhood trauma. Someone, somewhere in your childhood was not good to you. Or maybe it has to do with an overtly critical upbringing. For example, you had a really good dress on, you felt pretty, but for some reason, someone didn’t feel the same. Truly, that feeling of worthlessness remains with you even as adults. That’s why, to break this cycle of depression, and mental disorders in general, be gentle, absolutely gentle with kids.
- Criticism is a real downer on your self-esteem. Maybe you didn’t do your job well and was criticized infront of everyone. That has a significant toll on your mental health.
- Stress or a job rejection, or loss of any kind can make you feel that way.
There are many reasons why you are feeling this way. As for the solutions? Only if you are brave and ready to change!
Solutions
- Be kinder to yourself. Personally, I can actually get someone out of the darkness of their minds, cheer them up, help them get past an awful phase of life, and whatnot. I am the personal “therapist" of my friend group. But when it comes to my own self? Crickets. Nothing. No warmth, no kindness. Only criticism. Work on that, as I am working on it too.
- You absolutely deserve the kindness and warmth, that you give to everyone else. For once just sit with yourself and enlist a few good things about you. Not physically, but overall, in general.
- You will feel so much better, not today, maybe not tomorrow, but gradually as a habit forms of being kinder to yourself, one day you’ll wake up loving yourself.
- And that, is how you overcome “Feeling Worthless.”
I didn’t mention people or good friends in this one. Because this needs a mindset shift first and people second.
You need to work on your inner voice, because others telling you anything won’t get past the negative mantras in your head.
And as always, consult a therapist first for any mental illness. It will do you a whole lot of good!
That’s all for today, see you tomorrow!
